For the record, I have the cutest new apartment ever.

And a house plant named Jeramiah.

And one flat futon that is on the floor.

And dreams of a couch, a shower curtain liner, and a trash can.

I am so happy.
  ¶ 9:29 AM

  This is my last teacher work day before the children come. I am going to spend it trying to plan ahead. I think that this year I am going learn what it really means to have to lesson plan. Last year I didn't do very much of it, to be honest.

Luckily, I feel like my learning curve is much steeper this year, too. It hasn't taken me long at all to untangle the things I have to be doing with my classes. I am still totally in the dark about how to teach grammar. What a nightmare grammar has been for me my whole life. As a kid, I just read so much that I didn't have to be formally taught how to write. I just mimicked books. But these kids don't read enough to be able to do that. Anyone out there know a good program/ way to teach grammar?

Tonight is also exciting because I move into my new apartment! I will be in it with not a stick of furniture to my name, but it is exciting none the less. True independance!  ¶ 7:56 AM

  Will the two people from Sri Lanka and the three from Egypt who came to this site today under the search "First Sex Teacher" in Yahoo please comment and tell me if you actually read my site or just go away disappointed?
  ¶ 6:15 PM

  "We are the ones who are going to heal all of the problems of society."

Direct quote from the guy leading the seminar I went to today. Heavy, huh (and certainly a little self-important)? I had somehow managed to forget this feeling. You know how when you carry something really heavy for a long time, you start to get used to it. Then you put it down for awhile and when you pick it back up, it feels twice as heavy as it did the first time you had it? That is how I feel, emotionally, right now.

I managed to forget this feeling of intense pressure that I felt all last year. Though I don't feel like I am responsible for fixing "all of the problems of society" (if I did, I doubt I could get out of bed in the morning), I know that if I do a bad job over the course of the next nine months, some kid is not going into high school. Ugh.

The past two days of training at my new school, I have been ranting and raving about their curriculum standards. We have a system that, though not quite a "scripted curriculum", comes really close. I no longer get to chose what I am going to teach...all the way from which concepts to which stories. I have been going on about how they should just roll some robots into the classrooms. I've been really upset-- I'm attached to certain stories and ideas.

Today, at the seminar I went to, the speaker talked a lot about how school should be focused on the learning and not the teaching. And talked about how students-- overall and overwhelmingly-- acheive much higher scores when they are a part of this program we are doing. So now, I feel more okay about doing it their way. I do feel sad that I am sacrificing some of the creative aspects of my job... but I suppose that I should look at it as a situation to have to be more creative. I have to try even harder to make material interesting-- since I don't get to pick more interesting material.

I don't know how I feel about all this testing stuff. I do know that it isn't going anywhere soon, so I better figure out a way to live with it and not fight it.

I am already kind of exhausted. Day 3 and the kids aren't even here, yet. Heaven help me.
  ¶ 5:08 PM

  Today was the first day of my new teaching gig.

My classroom is soooo huge! Much much bigger than my little 'ol trailer of yesteryear. I have a space to put the kids who need "chill out" time this year instead of just making them sit two inches from a wall. I also have a teacher area where I can ask kids "Why are you here? You have no reason to be by my desk- none at all." and they can't argue. The only problem with a big room is that it takes so much energy to fix it up.

I went to the teacher store and bought two big maps because I know know that many kids around here can't distinguish between California and Michigan. They think that everything is close to Florida.

My new school is way more together-- curriculum-wise-- than my old school. It makes me feel insecure. The teams work together and stuff (or so it seems). My team is really cool and the social studies teacher is hilarious. It was a big and exciting day-- and they gave us free fruit and juice! Perks!

I am happy to be back teaching. I am sick of customer service. So sick of it. Now I only have to do it twenty hours a week!

I also get to move into my brand new apartment on Friday. I am pleased as punch. Red tropical punch.  ¶ 5:32 PM