Today I called in sick. I am mainly sick because I stayed up way too late doing karaoke with friends. I am also sick because I have to study for the Praxis II exam that I will be taking at 7am tomorrow morning. The third reason I am sick is that I had to go try to register for classes today at a community college near here.

All of the requirements that I have to meet in order to be certified to teach seem to be preventing me from having the time to actually teach. I am having a bit of a quandry because I was too late to register for classes today (by 5 minutes!) so I think that I am not going to meet that requirement. I don't know what that means for my license or for my ability to stay out the whole year at my school. They threaten to kick you out if your requirements aren't met by a certain time, but I don't know how serious that all is.

In other news, remember when I wrote about that kid Zach? His dad was dying of lupus? Well, as it turns out, it was a lie. His dad is apparently a fraud. Isn't it a sad world when that happens? What a weird thing to do. Yikes.

Off to try to register for online classes. I don't have a computer, so I don't know how that will all work...but I am a little desperate, now.
  ¶ 2:51 PM

  Yesterday’s comment about my negativity and self-absorption really took me aback. I guess I am lucky, actually, that I don’t get many negative responses to what I say. I forget that there are potential downfalls to spreading my thoughts around on such a "public venue". I guess I just always think that if someone hates what I say, they would just not come back and read again.

But it did make me think about whether I am just whining. It made me consider for a while whether I am too negative. I pondered whether I am too cynical. But then all of that thinking about myself made me feel very self-absorbed, so I stopped.

What Amanda L.’s comment did for me, in the end, was remind me that I write for a particular audience. I don’t write for the teachers who say things like, "Well, even if this new curriculum standard seems impossible, let’s all pull together for the children!" I don’t write for teachers who insist that one must remain cheery and smiley every second to prove that they love their kids.

I write for those of us who are pissed off that the educational system is so messed up and aren’t afraid to admit it. From watching teachers all around me, I find that the smiley, never negative or upset, teachers are usually the ones who are either right on the verge of a break-down or the ones that don’t seem to care one way or another about their kids.

I can be negative sometimes. I am upset sometimes. I feel like I can’t do this, sometimes. But only because I want to so badly.

So for us honest, complaining, cynical teachers—keep reading. We gotta sick together.
  ¶ 12:13 PM

  In fifteen short minutes, classes begin again.

I kind of missed these guys, I realize as I see them again. Well, some of them. Some of them still make my skin crawl.

New Years Resolutions:

1. Don't let it get personal in the classroom. I want to not take it so personally when they are jerks. It seems the only way to survive.

2. Be more prepared. If they are busy, they behave better. I know this. Now I must actually do work...even (gasp!) at night.

3. Volunteer with the Literacy Council. Again, get off my bootie.

4. Make more parent phone calls. A couple every day, maybe.

5. Be nicer. Try to be nicer.

The bell just rang. Here they come.  ¶ 8:02 AM