As a Teach for America alum, I felt like I should post this Onion article. It is so funny.
http://www.theonion.com/news/index.php?issue=4107&n=3
It finally happened to me. That moment. That moment that I had nightmares about on the night before my first day teaching. It happened to me.
I stood in front of my class to teach. The Assistant Superintendent of Curriculum was observing me. My fly was completely unzipped.
Luckily, one of my nice students motioned me to talk to her. I said, "Just a minute." She said, "No, Ms. R. Please? Can I just tell you something?" Then she whispered in my ear, "I’m not looking or anything, but your zipper is down."
I thanked her and zipped up my coat. I was right in the middle of a lesson about double-bubble maps—a lesson, incidentally, that required me to stand on tip-toes and point, thusly opening my fly even farther—so I couldn’t just zip it right in front of everyone. I stopped pointing and tried to move on.
I don’t know if the person observing me saw my zipper down. But I thank the stars above that one of the kids just didn’t scream out, "I can see your underwear!" or worse, that the entire room didn’t just giggle and make fun of me and not tell me at all.
I am so thankful that I just gave the girl who told me quietly all of my Valentine’s Day candy.
Two teachers just stopped outside my door. One said, "Mrs. I! You won’t believe it!" Mrs. I replied, "Tell me!" The first teacher said, "Jesus talked to me last night. He said that I was bathed in the light of the holy cross and that I had passed my Praxis exam!" Mrs. I squealed, "Sweet, sweet, sweet Jesus! Praise Him!"
I couldn’t make this stuff up. I wonder what it will be like to teach somewhere not this religious. I find all of it fascinating…especially the visuals that these kinds of conversations conjure. I don’t know if I will ever be able to look at a troubled student again and not picture him or her "hanging on the cross with Jesus".
In other news, I am waiting on my Praxis results, too. But I have received word neither from the Praxis people or Jesus. I guess I just have to wait for the U.S. mail.