Thursday, January 06, 2005
Yesterday’s comment about my negativity and self-absorption really took me aback. I guess I am lucky, actually, that I don’t get many negative responses to what I say. I forget that there are potential downfalls to spreading my thoughts around on such a "public venue". I guess I just always think that if someone hates what I say, they would just not come back and read again.

But it did make me think about whether I am just whining. It made me consider for a while whether I am too negative. I pondered whether I am too cynical. But then all of that thinking about myself made me feel very self-absorbed, so I stopped.

What Amanda L.’s comment did for me, in the end, was remind me that I write for a particular audience. I don’t write for the teachers who say things like, "Well, even if this new curriculum standard seems impossible, let’s all pull together for the children!" I don’t write for teachers who insist that one must remain cheery and smiley every second to prove that they love their kids.

I write for those of us who are pissed off that the educational system is so messed up and aren’t afraid to admit it. From watching teachers all around me, I find that the smiley, never negative or upset, teachers are usually the ones who are either right on the verge of a break-down or the ones that don’t seem to care one way or another about their kids.

I can be negative sometimes. I am upset sometimes. I feel like I can’t do this, sometimes. But only because I want to so badly.

So for us honest, complaining, cynical teachers—keep reading. We gotta sick together.
¶ 9:13 AM